Poetry
gives voice to the quiet battles many endure but rarely share. Written over
the span of 18 months, these poems weave a deeply personal yet universal
journey of survival and resilience in seek of liberation.
Through raw honesty and lyrical rhythm, Tut Yashar explores themes of love,
loss, injustice, silence and happiness. At its heart, this book reflects the
emotional reality of abuse—not only the pain itself but also the
loneliness, judgment, and shame that often follow. Each poem is both
confession and release, inviting readers to feel seen, validated, and less
alone in their own struggles.
Domestic Silence is not just about one story—it is about many. It speaks
to anyone who has felt trapped, silenced, or invisible, whether by
circumstances, relationships, or society. It reminds us that healing is
possible, that freedom can be reclaimed, and that our voices deserve to be
heard.
Whether you are a survivor, an ally, or someone seeking deeper understanding
of the human condition, this book offers hope, comfort, courage, and
connection.
EXCERPT
“Your abuse is an explosive nucleus in my core.“
“I am far from free,
And my mind is free.”
“My voice is a bell not rung.”
“I know there are eighteen holes altogether
And that people play in any weather.”
“It’s hard to hide when I need to feel empowered.
I can’t be a coward.
It’s all up to me.”
“It’s not enough to simply survive
Even more than before, I want to thrive!”
“I so need a break,
And a big piece of cake.
Yet I’m not in the mood for a cake:
I have an ongoing ache.”
“I have no regret.”
“When things seem quieter, fear rises;
I tend to think it’s a bait.”
“I’m one out of three.
Nothing special about me.
It’s a new reality.”
“It’s hard to hear my own voice,
People have so many things to say.”
“I had big plans, to be on stage.
Now I have to spend my time in a cage.
I have dreams from which I refuse to disengage!”
“I can’t be merciful or frail.
I can’t break and I can’t fail.
I have to be strong and prevail,”
“Mercy and logic are at war.
I’m confused as to what is the score.”
“The plot unfolds as time passes by.
I’ve suffered enough and I’m ready to fly.”
“I don’t want to fight
And I don’t want to die.”
“There are no needs in my life,
I have learned to live near death.
Every day, I choose life.”
“I lost an abuser
And gained my life.”
“It’s me and my baby and a Hurricane.
I’m not concerned.
I can protect my child.
Look what I survived.”
“Now,
I am the protector
Of our home.”
“Words are not enough
For this poet.”
“I wanted his protection,
But he hurt me the most.”
“The abyss between us is deeper than his love.”
“I think I have had enough.
My life doesn’t need to be rough.
Yes, I am very tough,
But I’m here on this earth to laugh.”
“I love my life, and I want to live.
Therefore, I always try to forgive,
Yet sometimes I must be combative
So that I can continue to grow.”
“I’m tired and I’m afraid to drain.
I don’t mean to complain,
Just to explain.”
“I feel this passive tension,
Like my heart is under oppression.”
“Can poems even deliver
The wounds of a loving giver?”
“I hear in paradise,
There is no ice.”
“I am battling for my freedom.”
“Where do the bees hide when it rains?
The wind blows hard as I pick my brain.”
“Being a good leader requires the ability to intricately balance between multiple elements.
One must accept analytical concepts, and also sentiments.”
“Fear doesn’t stop me.
I have cruise control.”
“People who don’t acknowledge equality
Never feel peace and are bound to destroy.”
“From time to time,
I panic within.
I remember what
Happened
To me.”
“I want my voice to be heard!
Word for word.
Severe expressions, not slurred.”
“My heart loudly sings my story of violence.
No power on earth can keep me in silence.”
“I feel quietude admiring
What I cannot possess.”
“It’s a sunny day,
And I want to be out.
But I’m not okay,
Can’t go about.”
“The horror I’ve been through isn’t visible.
I believe I seem somewhat invincible.”
“Shame, shame, I feel shame.
My heart drips tears, and it’s also in flames.”
“… forgiveness becomes
The Achilles heel
Of a fool.”
“When you’re away,
I love you freely.”
“My pain
Is private.”
“To keep myself safe, I felt had no choice
But to remain in silence and nullify my voice.”
“I want to be safe from harm, free of his torture.
I want to feel I have the time to self-nurture.”
“I represent good,
But still, I am at war.
So, am I good?”
“Anger eats through the body like rust through steel.”
“I watch the birds dancing in the sky.
Oh, to be so joyous.”
“A predator
Is chasing me”
“I have a story to tell.
I want to tell it well.
In strangers, I am confiding.”
“I’m alone under a threat.
I have no outlet.”
“God is at my side, and I can tell,
Even through hell, I acknowledge well
How blessed I am.”
“Here, after hours
I’m building towers.”
“Teddy bears in my living room.
A memory of a woman diva.
Makeup rots in beautiful containers.“
“If sorrow had a face,
It would be mine.
I pretend to be,
But I am not fine.”
“I miss so many people
Who are here.”
“Background music reminds me of my alienation.”
“No selfies for the selfless”
“No one is here to protect me
I can only rely on God
And be thankful to be alive.”
“Can beauty coexist with terror?
I don’t know when I look in the mirror.”
Tut Yashar is a poet and advocate for self-fulfillment whose words shine a
light on the hidden corners of the human experience. With a background in law,
finance and operations, she blends analytical precision with raw emotional
honesty to create poetry that resonates deeply with readers. Writing has been
her lifelong companion, a source of healing, and a way to transform pain into
strength.
Her work explores themes of freedom, resilience, love, and the silent
struggles we often carry alone. Tut’s poetry speaks to anyone who has
ever felt unseen, unheard, or silenced—reminding them that they are not
alone and that healing is possible. Domestic Silence is her debut published
collection, and she is also the author of two forthcoming poetry books.
Through her writing, Tut strives to inspire readers to embrace their voice,
reclaim their power, and discover self-fulfillment in the face of life’s
challenges.
